It would be Mom's 65th birthday today. Time is a funny thing; although it seems like a very long time since we lost Mom (I think because so much has happened in the last few years), memories still provide a very real experience of Mom for me on a daily basis. I still feel like I could pick up the phone and call her - she will always be that close and present to me. And for that, I am grateful!
We love Jude's little pointer finger. It sounds weird (!), but it is just something you have to see. It is so short, stocky, and pudgy that it is always drawing our attention. And, of course, he is at the stage where he is trying to communicate with us by pointing to everything and grunting that the pudgified finger is his way of telling us what he wants. He has not shown signs of losing that baby fat in his thighs, his little pin cushion hands or the 'permanent bracelet' (as Grandma Lee called it) around his wrist and ankles; the day when these endearing features disappear will be sad....:)
On Tuesday we piled in the car and headed downtown to check out the Macy's Christmas display. It really was a mini little adventure since for the kids it was MEGA stimuli. They are checking everything out, looking at people and trying to size them up. Faustina has a terrible problem of looking around at everything with a result that she runs into people, walls, or anything that is directly in front of her.
They particularly enjoyed the skyway. Faustina noticed them while we were driving in the car, so she was pretty excited to walk through one. We saw St. Nick, Faustina mailed a letter to Santa and asked him for a 'big car', and we had a very impressive lunch of soup and salad at some place I had never heard of.
If you watch any of this little video of Faustina's first dance recital....you'll see that the recital didn't go as well as the practices did. Faustina is the one on the far right side that is not moving. :)
Yesterday Faustina's dance class had their first performance in front of parents showing everyone what they have been learning. It was very cute and the group of 2 year olds did a great job. Whether Faustina was tired, just observing, or didn't feel like dancing - who knows - but she didn't break out any of her 'moves' yesterday.
You can see in the pictures, Faustina is the only girl without a tutu. She refuses to wear any dance skirt ( I guess I can't blame her, I did when I was that age too). To my great surprise, she agreed to wear a very cute flower hair barrette that a friend made for her. Of course, she had teddy with her.
It has actually been a snow weekend. But here in MN, no school year is complete without one 'snow day'! And we got it today.
We are still snowed in here on Morgan Ave. and who knows when the St. Paul city plow will come and rescue us. It has been a fun, relaxing weekend. Actually, I like MN blizzard weather when you are stuck in your house. It means movie time, cocoa, hanging out with family to the point that things can get a bit goofy with toddlers. They are funny little people. I did venture out Saturday morning. I shoveled a foot of snow (and then Mike did the rest of it at night, crazy!) I was loving my mukluk boots so much I decided to go for about a mile walk down by the river. It was actually very enjoyable and very peaceful, but as I was walking home against the wind, it DID feel like a blizzard. I pulled a Rocky Balboa when he is in Russia training for his fight - I started running in the middle of the street with the wind beating me in the face in order to get home a bit quicker! A few things I noticed on my walk (you have got to love MN winter culture):
- In the mile walk I saw only 4 cars on the street (weather like this you definitely use your garage!!) - All four of the cars I saw had their windshield wipers up in anticipation of the snow - People were snowblowing their sidewalks with full body apparel, full face masks and all so that all you could see was eyeballs. The men were either dressed in orange or hunting green camouflage outfits - I saw the most beautiful blue jay down by the river that owned Mississippi Blvd. He was gorgeous and he was very lively! - A van was stuck in the driveway and people were digging themselves out - A man was snowblowing apartment sidewalks by the river and snowblower died, he was not happy since he was pretty far away from the garage - there were drifts so high at some point that the snow came up to my waist (no exaggeration!) - Mark Dayton lawn signs that were covered so that you couldn't even see the name anymore
People snowed in, the metrodome collapsing, you never know what MN winters will bring!
I was remembering the Halloween storm when we got 30 inches and we spent most of that day delivering the newspaper! We did delivered it - what were we thinking?! I was 11 years old and the snow came up to my chest as I trudged through the snow with newspapers. Glad I don't have to every think about delivering a newspaper in my life again! :)
I am part of a women's group on Tuesday nights that reads various documents of the Catholic Church and discusses them. This evening, at one point, we were talking about the four last things: death, heaven, hell, and judgment.
We were talking more in depth about how there are 2 judgments: a particular judgment when a person dies, but then also another 'final' judgment when Christ comes. This final judgment only comes at the very 'end' because after we die, our good or bad deeds and influences continue on in this world to affect it in a very real way. Any of our actions have a ripple effect on people, how people think, and often times their decisions. This list of people we influence includes immediate and extended family, friends, co-workers, childhood friends, schoolmates, neighbors, anyone. It is mind-boggling to think that one person's actions have a ripple effect on all of eternity! And that is why there is a last judgment - we need to wait and see what happens in the world and we will be judged accordingly.
Perhaps it can be overwhelming to think of wrongs I have done in the past, but it is exciting to think of all the possibilities to do good in the future for people. The ancients believed a large family, fame and reputation, and many possessions were a sign of a 'good' man. In the Christian life, however, the truth is that Christ wants us to serve others, sacrifice in whatever way he calls us to, and we may never know the full impact we have on other people.
A memory came to my mind the other day about my Mom. We were driving home down Randolph in St. Paul and she was telling me how incredibly happy she was in life. But she loved her husband and children more than anything, she loved staying at home, and just loved her life. She said she wouldn't give anything to change her age of 42 or stage in life to go back in the past or be younger. I remember thinking, "Really? I think I have a way more fun life than you Mom!" Haha.
But those little things matter, and obviously my Mom's influence stuck with me since I remember it now! And hopefully I can pass on that same love of life, ability to live in the present moment and zeal for serving our Lord that my Mom had.
The catechism says that the faithful believe we were redeemed at our baptism, believe we are being redeemed in the present time, and have hope we will be redeemed on the last day. What a merciful God we have - He certainly covers everything!
St. Nicholas depicted smacking the Heresiarch Arius around!
Last night, we all got our St. Nicholas fix. Since it was St. Nicholas' feast day, a.k.a. Santa Clause, he was the topic of dinner conversation. Faustina was enthralled with his story and couldn't wait to leave the table to put her shoes outside for him. Mike was telling us about how St. Nicholas got in a debate with a heretic and 'kicked his butt'; this phrase, of all things ended up sticking in her mind, of course! After dinner she stood at the window for about 10 minutes looking intently out into the dark insisting she saw him.
We were on our way to Target and we told her that perhaps St. Nicholas would visit our house while we were gone. While we were leaving Target, Teta kept telling me that St. Nicholas 'kicked Santa Clauses' butt' and the reindeer were mad about it. I was trying to correct her story since she got the people mixed up, but she only got angry when I tried to correct her. She then yelled it louder with the result of more heads turning our way!
When we got home, Mike showed Faustina St. Nicholas' 'tracks' in the snow and there were 2 simple toys for each Jude and Faustina. She was thrilled and ended up sleeping with them. She wanted to see pictures of St. Nick and talk about him all night, it was fun to see her enthusiasm and partial understanding. She is at the perfect age for learning about such traditions.
UPDATE:
For the record, I said that St. Nicholas "slapped Arius" because Arius was being a "bad boy". This is true! St. Nicholas slapped the heretic Arius, source of the Arian heresy, at the council of Nicea for questioning the divinity of Christ. Anyway, we are not encouraging violence, despite sounding otherwise. However, I am not against teaching our kids how to snuff out heresy!
Over Thanksgiving break and this past week, we have been heavy into projects here at the house. For the past, well, 4 years, I guess (where did time go?!) we have been meaning to get all of our floor boards in, finish some floor work by our front entry way, and finish our stairs. Mike also hung some nice doors in the basement. We are almost there! Mike is mostly done with the floor boards, the front entry way got done this week and the stairs are on deck for this coming week. It will be a breath of fresh air to have these things done, and we will be happy with the way the house is. Of course there are always new ideas and things that could be done, but nothing necessary or pressing. Owning a home is always an ongoing project! While our floor was being stained, we spent three days at Grandpa Lee's. It was almost a mini vacation for me as I mostly sat by the fireplace (we depleted a good portion of Grandpa's firewood) and I worked on my knitting projects for the my brother, Aaron's family.
I found a bunch of my old stuff from high school and college.
The moment brought to the fore an opportunity to reflect upon the past. I did some some serious thinking about the great existential questions of life. For instance, I wonder if posters are "cool" anymore. I suppose teens put posters up on their stupid, fake Facebook "walls" now.
At any rate, the posters are amusing and are a reach back into the past when I had some different (and possibly cooler) priorities: metal, movies, soccer, alcoholic beverages, etc.
Here's a shot of some of the posters. Hmmm... I see some important faces and images of our modern times:
Bono of U2 er, um... some bottled beer Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery David Seaman (nice 'stash on the English 'keeper!) Eddie Van Halen some crazy Pink Floyd picture the Led Zeppelin angel-looking-guy Jimi Hendrix Diego Maradona, Argentinian soccer star and cocaine addict Jim Morrison of the Doors Jason Newsted, formerly of the formerly great band, Metallica The Super Fans Vic Rattlehead (Megadeth's perennial mascot)... maybe I should hang this in Jude's room... maybe not. a vodka shot???? Tony Meola, goalkeeper for '94 U.S. World Cup team Manchester United's logo (British Premier League Soccer) Kiss (just pause on this for a moment... chest hair and full make-up: Zen) uhhh: The Stairway to Heaven (black-light edition) The 1998 Apple Valley Eagles State Championship Soccer team... of which I was not the star goalkeeper because I broke my thumb (that idiot in the front row-his fault!)
And most importantly: The great Ringo Starr
Some of the most important figures of our time, really. Hegel was right, was he not? We are truly living in the greatest age of man.
Back to deeper thoughts... My priorities are different now and I ponder if maybe I can have a little of both worlds. For instance, could my Honda Odyssey minivan allow me to channel some of "the good ol' days"?????? Odyssey offers practical features, safety for the kids, and...
Wednesday night we did the deed. It was time! Jude's first golden locks came off. I am not one for boys with long hair, and Jude was beginning to have helmet hair, if you will. He is now affectionately known as Army Boy by Dad and Faustina. I like it!
This Thanksgiving I am especially grateful for all the saints we have that give us a constant example of how to live a Christian life full of grace and perseverance. The saints truly are a gift in my life as there are so many men and women of God to learn about and be a model to me.
There are layers upon layers to dive into when it come to the saints. These men and women have lived through all the different time periods, face every difficulty imaginable plus more (!), and each one has a different story. I love learning about their lives, becoming acquainted with his or her person, and learning from them. Scripture is a wonderful tool to use to grow in holiness (of course!), but the saints provide concrete examples of sinful human beings (like us!) walking the hard Christian walk. And another wonderful thing is that the Pope is canonizing more saints all the time! Just a few short weeks ago, he canonized 5 more men and women. More holy men and women to learn about and be an example to me.
I have always considered myself 'lucky' or blessed to have my birthday fall on the Feast day of 'All Saints Day' in the Catholic Church. I vividly remember reading chapter books about St. Bernadette and St. Therese the Little Flower when I first was reading chapter books.
This past year I have been concentrating more specifically on a few saints, namely St. Teresa of Avila and St. Therese the little flower. I have known their stories for some time, but as I read their autobiographies or other books they wrote, I learn more about them the insights they have in spiritual life.
This is what is new to me: I can actually have a sort of relationship with these women. I can ask for their intercession in daily prayer and novenas. I was spending some time with a friend a few weeks ago and she gave me the novena for St. Therese the Little Flower. She said several years ago as her family was going through some harder situations, she invited St. Therese into her home and asked her to be an 'older' sister to her.
Having a relationship with the saints makes more and more sense to me as I continue to miss my own earthly mother. And Mary has been right there for me through this journey. This relationship with Mary started in a more serious way in fall of '07 when I was pregnant with Faustina. When I felt terribly nauseous I would sit in the bathtub and say a rosary. Saying the rosary became a habit from this point on. Well, in January of '09 when I was pregnant with Jude, I was saying the rosary and I had an inspiration to especially pray for my Mom and her health concerning cancer. I was so struck by this because I never worried much about Mom's cancer returning and this was a scary new thought for me. 3 weeks later we found out that Mom's cancer was back and the hard year of '09 began. Mary, however, continued to sustain me with grace through this hard time. Thank you, Mary!
It was hilarious to see Jude interact with a mirror he found that was on his level. He was fascinated with seeing himself! He kept walking away and then walking back to it, giggling, and making faces in it. He is a delightful little boy.
Mike and I are not sure how much Faustina remembers of Grandma Lee, if any. But Faustina is making some connections; if I ever seem sad to her, she asks me if I am missing Grandma.
While we were in the car this afternoon, out of the blue, she initiated a conversation about Grandma Lee.
Faustina: Momma,I want to go to Grandma's house Me: Do you mean Grandpa's? He is not there, he is gone deer hunting. Faustina: Nooo! I want to go to Grandma's. (she made it very clear) Me: Well, Faustina we all miss Grandma; but we trust and believe she is in Heaven now. Faustina: Is heaven God's house? (what - did she really just ask that?) Me: Yes, it is. Faustina: I want to go to heaven to see Grandma and God. Me: We can see God here on earth too. But if we serve and love God during our lives, someday we can go to heaven like Grandma. Faustina: Oh.Okay.
On Friday we were able to take care of friends' 4 month old baby, Ava. It was absolutely fascinating to see how Faustina responded to her and helped take care of her.
I know many toddlers like babies, but Faustina really wanted to be her mother!The five hours Ava was with us, Faustina's attention did not waver. She wanted to feed her, burp her, give her toys, she insisted if Ava cried that her tummy hurt because she was hungry.
I guess the most surprising thing to me was that she actually was helpful! I don't expect toddlers to be of much help until they are maybe three or four, and even then it seems limited. For the better part of an hour I was able to work at the stove a few feet away from Faustina and Ava while Faustina played with her and actually gave a bottle when she was fussy.
Just a few minutes ago I was holding Jude in blanket and Faustina was holding her baby wrapped in a blanket;every single action and affection I displayed she imitated me exactly for about 15 minutes. Hilarious. It was like I was looking in the mirror, except it was my daughter; it is all very fun.
Of course, Faustina's mothering side also includes her following Jude around saying, "No, No, No....Jude. You stop that or you will go in your crib. One...Two...Three..."
Click here to see an amazing picture of a baby at 10 weeks. I would dare to say that if we had pictures like these back in the '70's, Roe v Wade would have had a different outcome...
On Friday Faustina started her ballet lessons. Did she like it? Well, she cried when we had to go home... At this point there is a lot of jumping up and down and running around in the two year old class. But you have to start somewhere!
This month the weather has been absolutely unbelievable. We have been spending a lot of time outside. I will miss out 'second living room' aka. our front yard when the snow starts to fly! We have been spending pretty much all our time outside lately. Faustina gave this ride to Faustina probably one hundred times.
